"america is silly"

Saturday morning one section of our unconventional family departed for a day trip to the national park. Wearing their finest attire, Secil (5), Samjana (6), Radika (7), Ishwor (8), and Buddhi (10), carried their ever-present grins and curiosity through every nook and cranny of the day. The following are just a few of the many highlights:

1. The straight-billed Harry Potter hat Secil wore...if only he knew that this teenage wizard was in fact the world's most famous orphan--an appropriate hero.

2. Buddhi's naturalist eyes during the safari as he pointed out the hidden wildlife even before our guide spotted them.

3. The fact that each child took more of a variety of transportation than ever before: local bus, rickshaw, elephant, truck and taxi.

4. Watching Buddhi stick his head out of the taxi's backseat window as he felt the wind through his hair.

5. Secil: "Abba, abba, abba." (a Nepali word we don't know)
Me, sarcastically: "Oh, are you referring to the Swedish pop band, Secil?"
Secil, confidently: "Yesth." (this is his typical lisped response)

6. Hankerchiefs make snot/bratface Samjana more than tolerable...in fact, lovable.

7. We found a secret, rotten playground just before the safari, so naturally we soared on swings and squeaked down slides.

8. While giving the children a tour of our hotel that we had stayed at, Ishwor looked at the ropes that were bordering their gardens and responded, "Look, wrestling!!!" He then proceeded to climb between the ropes into the 'ring' like his favorite WWE (no more WWF) performers...we pray they take to reading soon.

9. We got more than one interested stare seeing that 2 white women were holding hands with 5 Nepali children all day.

10. Overweight Slovak men wearing speedos climbed elephants in water to background working Nepali women washing clothes. Secil pointed to these men and back to us, "Same, same." We tried to explain that all white people aren't the same...but they were too overwhelmed...and we don't know their language.

11. On the road leading up to the park the children kept screaming "Hati, hati!" at every picture of an elephant, but when they saw their first one strut in front of our restaurant while eating breakfast, they remained wide-eyed and jaw-dropped.

Our day consisted of dal bhat fine dining with fork and spoon,


Radika & Budi

First time using a napkin for Secil

watching elephants bathe, playing on ground, staring as more elephants pounded their selves downtown, the actual safari where the children saw monkeys, a rhino, deer, and numerous birds, and sweets like cake and pie.

The kids were kinda small for the elephant boxseat

And who could forget the taxi ride back which the children almost liked more than the elephant safari!

Radika, our hazeled eyed 8 year old, was nothing but giggles and beauty the entire day.

In fact, the first week we arrived when all the childrens' names ran together, I referred to her as Bright Eyes. They're stunning, and as an advocate for short hair, this girl was made to wear it. She is one of the 3 girls who rotate everyday for position next to Britta's hand on the way to school....they recently developed a schedule which has quieted the fighting (: But on this day, her small teeth and tan skin soaked in not only more sun but the majesty of wildlife and jungles and the awkwardness of riding an elephant. She along with the other children were so delightful all day long. At the end of the day Britta and I found ourselves wishing we could have spent such intentional time with every single kid like we did with these five.

We came back home to hugs and kisses, and our kiddos were able to brag about the whole day. Since they were the only ones who hadn't been yet, it was if they were chiming in on the long string of elephant tales (pun included).

The next day I was taken to the Emergency Room in an ambulance. Let me explain. All day Sunday I was having incredible upperabdomenal pain (mixture of severe heartburn and a thousand punches to the gut). I am one who has much experience in the gastrointestinal area, and had never experienced such pain. Naturally we were a little nervous, so when it got nothing but worse later on that night Britta called Laxmi and said that we needed to go to the doctor just to get some medication, she immediately came with an ambulance to pick me up at the orphan home. Think of this ambulance as a little less flamboyant than Scooby and the gang's Mystery Machine. The ER proved to be a couple doctors and friends smiling and laughing repeating "Kursani, kursani," (chili) which did nothing but make me furious. Britta defended my body by saying that we have eaten chili twice a day for 6 weeks. They were a little impressed and asked if I had taken any meds that day. After confessing of 4 IBprofins, their eyes got wide and worry turned to an immediate shot. Only when we returned to our room did we read that that's not what you're supposed to take if you have any kind of stomach pain. A little embarrassing. But a couple days and only a little pain later, and I survived yet another hospital visit in the month of February. That makes 3 in the past 4 years...this month is just asking for trouble. I didn't have Jocelyn this time, but Britta was there every step of the way..you would have been proud, Joce.

Our departure is approaching ever-nearer, and the kids have off caught wind. Sima screamed in horror, Soniya has written me 2 notes in the past 2 days that say "I love you, Bicca, my sitara (sister)," and as everyone was going to bed the other night, Kumari (housemom) and Ramesh (oldest boy) were trying to convince us not to got back to America. We tried to explain that we had to go see our families to which Kumari responded, "No go. Orphan home children, you(r) Nepali family," and Ramesh added, "America is silly." (It is the one word he has not understood even though we have tried to explain it for the past 6 weeks).

And so after rhinos and elephants, taxis that make a young boy's hair bend with the wind, and mystery machines as ambulances, I know only two things for sure: love oozes from the pores of our Nepali family and America is, indeed, silly.

pretty in pink

Since our mini-excursion last week to the National Park, life has been back to normal in our little world...for the most part. Britta and I have made a record 4 different trips to the Naranghat market (an 8 mile trek roundtrip that we scurried to only 3 times our entire first month) for various reasons:

1) our kiddos finally finished their photo assignments (or their 'have as much fun as you possibly can taking pictures with an old film camera' project...see Britta's blog for an for more details), and so we dropped off the film and yesterday picked up the final results of hilarious self portraits/baby goats/baisi/modeling shots that included many of us..the children loved them-->success.

Ashish shows off his skills

2) Laxmi informed us last weekend that she wanted to buy us a present for our time spent at the orphan home, so our first day back we picked out fabric and a sweet tailor took our measurements for a Nepali Kurta Salwar (long tunic-type top that reaches the knees and tight ankle pants). It was the first time either one of us had had anything professionally tailored, and both turned out beautiful.

3) We found a small bakery with the most divine sweet bars (think of the perfect consistency of the inside of a butterfinger with pistachios on top)....and had to get our fill of dudchia (milk tea).

Besides days out on the town, home as been plugging right along. New mom (Samjana), her 15 month old boy (Manish), and 5 year old Manessa have snuggled in quite nicely after the initial crowdedness.

Babu, Samjana, Manessa

In fact, the more Samjana talks the more her voice reminds me of a young Lauren Bacall (the falling-in love with Humphrey Bogart at the age of 19 Lauren)...smooth and deep, and incredibly lovely. The older girls have been weening Baboo (baby boy) off of his mother's breast by including him in play time, and Manessa is an adorable free spirit, who, when we gave her a camera yesterday (she was excluded in the first batch because she wasn't here), and I took the first picture of her grinning, she cooed, giggled, then grabbed my face with both hands and gave me Italian kisses.

Tomorrow we take our five to the wildlife. Should be more than fantastic. Stories to come.

The spotlight now turns to Sarswati, our 8 year old servant intellect whose fashion taste makes the most of her village life, and whose smile makes you believe in peace.

Barnone, she gets the gentle spirit award for our crew. In fact, just a few weeks in when Britta and I were getting a little tired of the stares and laughs, we focused on the night when we waited for the lights to go back on in order to eat dal bhat, and as Britta and I were sitting on one of the children's beds, Sarswati snuggled in between us and held our hands. We sat there in complete silence for about 15 minutes. There was so much warmth, protection, and love in those 15 minutes that it muted every annoyance we could have imagined.


Sarswati with best bud, Sima

Her signature red hat

That is the perfect picture for this child. She is so rare that I can't even compare her to someone I've met in my lifetime (maybe a Lauren Plummer...quiet, funny, gentle, smart, etc. [don't think you're not, lady]). Everyone loves her but there is not one ounce of pride or rudeness. Recently when the other girls have been slacking on washing dishes with us, there she is scrubbing away at the nastiest pots and pans without one complaint...just that smile that brings peace. And yesterday, after much compost and dirt was dug up, she found a nastier toy that was caked in dung and neglect; therefore, she took her hands and the toy to the well where she scrubbed away the muck with a toothbrush and gave the toy new life. She pays attention to the small things all day long, and makes it her purpose to comfort and encourage. I love this child. We're bringing her home too. Not to mention that she was the girl who got one of the top 3 awards at school for her exam grades. All around.

I hope to be like Sarswati when I grow up.

boxed seats

We need to begin this week's update on Monday. Unfortunately, Britta came down with a horrible 24 bug, so in odd fashion, I went alone with the kiddos to their school program. The children were already a tadbit used to me, but it didn't stop hundreds of eyes and bodies to gravitate toward me. Luckily, I had my hands held tight by my bhais and baihinis (younger brothers and sisters), and sweet Soniya acted as my bodyguard by pushing away abrasive students and jabbering back in Nepali, that "No, she doesn't want a photo of you so back on off of us"...or something like that. Suddenly, I became a part of game. As one of the 'guardians' I was ushered into a circle created by the hundreds of giggling children made up of 20 women. The gist was that each woman tied a balloon to her ponytail and, by using only your left hand, you tried to pop all the other balloons before yours was defeated. My extreme height advantage was disqualified because of my lack of ponytail. And so with my balloon stuck to the back of my tee shirt I came in 4th place. One woman got a busted nose, and the winner started splitting wood, trekking the jungles, and building homes since she was born...and didn't start giving birth much long after that...she is a bit more hardcore than I. The seven hour program was mostly boring after that except for when Sarswati, our precious 7 year old, got one of the 3 top exam awards for the whole school!!

Britta went to the ER that day. A checkup and 4 different medicines cost a wopping $4. Seriously. And so with antibiotics and much sleep, we departed for the National Park one day and two semi-healthy women later. Our friend, Guru, in Kathmandu had made arrangements for us at the Unique Wild Resort (which was both unique and wild, I must add) with a stunning 3 day schedule that included in order: Sunset by the river, Cultural 'Program', Canoe ride, Elephant Breeding Center visit, Elephant Jungle Safari, Birdwatching, and Elephant Bathing. This, along with 2 nights stay, 3 meals of non-daal bhat, and as much dud & kalaochia (milk & black tea) as our hearts desired was the half the price of a one-night stay at any average American hotel. Basically, we got Nepali rate because we look Nepali now...we're pretty much unrecognizable.

We absolutely loved the 3 different guides from our hotel, Jaug, Lax, and Mahendra. As we first entered the national park, Jaug pointed out some fresh rhino dung. We stared at it and anxiously asked what we should do if we saw a rhino on foot. He told us that we should run very fast and climb a tree. And to our 2nd, more anxious question he answered, "Oh yes, they are known to be one of the most aggressive animals toward humans because of how many people they kill here every year...I tell you this not to scare you [he saw the fear] but to tell you truth." Grizzly bears don't even scare me as much as rhinos did at that moment. In fact, the unexpected fear factor was a common theme throughout our stay. We had a leaking canoe in man-eating, crocodile waters, our elephant busted out in a cantor half into our safari, and we were almost certain that we were going to fall off of our bathing elephant with him on top of us.

The sunset was breathtaking except for our sweet Chinese friends who kept petting and taking pictures with the stray dogs (I'm pretty sure that this is the equivalent of allowing yourself to be covered with pidgeons in Venice...you just don't do it). Our cultural program was filled with native dances and song, including an emcee who said in between all 6 programs, "Nameste, good evening and welcome back, all my viewers." With a smiling face that we were convinced was altered by alcohol or the local marijuana leaf he pronounced 'Continuously' 'Cantonese-ly'...he made us happy.

The following day we fed baby elephants crackers. Their tusks slithered around our necks as we played hide and seek with the treats. It felt like the python I allowed around my neck in elementary school. They were so adorable and we were told that we could take one home. We told Mahendra that they wouldn't get through customs and he laughed. He liked these tall Nepali women. And then it happened. While trying to reformat the remaining space on my camera's memory card to allow more space, without warning it 're-formatted' all of my photos...meaning that it deleted them...all 250. Since my computer hasn't worked since my first week at the orphan home, I lost the past month's worth of photos. There was a photo-shaped hole in my universe for about 24 hours. But Britta has taken fabulous shots, I got the jungle safari and bathing moments...and for the hour that I was at the orphan home this afternoon, I took at least 30 pictures of the kids. It still was wretched in the moment.

But a few hours later I was sitting on top of an elephant looking at crocodile, peacocks, monkeys, and a mama rhino with her 5 week old baby. That will pretty much put anyone in a better mood!! Besides breaking out in full speed at one point, it was fabulously awkward and unfamiliar to sit atop such an enormous beast of an animal...and Britta and I were convinced that the baby rhino was actually a robotic dinosaur from Jurassic Park. After the elephant dropped us off in town, we enjoyed a quiet dinner at our resort. Lax, the youngest guide, stopped by to check in with our day. We ended up talking about being raised in the park as a child (2 of his best friends were killed by the wildlife--one tiger, one rhino), were amazed at his fluent English, and enjoyed comparing annoying guest stories from our different hotel experiences in National Parks on other sides of the world (Evidently, Indian guests carry a bad stereotype of being high-maintenance...open-aired jeeps get to much dust in the hair).

Our last morning we watched a couple male peacocks literally 'shake their tailfeathers' to get the attention of the surrounding ladies...one took a little more time than the other...ladies just sometimes aren't impressed even with the fanciest of tailfeathers. Shortly after our birdwatching, Britta and I made our way down to the riverside to watch the elephants bathing. We were invited to join in the bath, and cautiously stepped all over his dry, dusty skin to ride this elephant bareback. We were sure we would fall, but eventually got the rhythym of his shoulders under our thighs and held onto each other for dear life (Eventually I'll figure out a way to put these photos up, because we laughed or screamed the entire time...and they're hilarious). With such a roller coaster ride's worth of adrenaline, I can't help but look on that experience as the highlight from our little adventure.

We left with an eagerness to see our kiddos. We were like proud parents talking about them our entire time away, and they greeted us with hugs and kisses (and a couple angry moods that said 'Don't ever leave us again' that sooner than later turned into giggles and held hands). 5 weeks in and only 3 weeks remain of our time at Harka. We don't like to think about it, really...we just keep on participating in the imaginitative world of fire, rockets, moons, treasures, and tickles that turn to breathless laughter.

gettin' crowded

Last Wednesday afternoon as Britta and I settled into our routine, several people came by the orphan home. This isn't entirely uncommon considering the fact that neighbors come by to chat, check out the goings on, and stare at us rather regularly; however, come night time this young mother with her infant boy and a toddler girl were still hanging out. It wasn't until Laxmi came by with her frantic personality to explain that the young mother's husband had recently died of liver cancer and the toddler girl was just orphaned by both parents' death. Soooo we just added 3 new members to the crew.

Considering the fact that Laxmi knows little English, we have slowly put puzzle pieces together with certain childrens' circumstances. It pretty much goes that the 'government police' calls either Laxmi or Prim to see if there is any room for the stranded souls. Granted the situation and the nature of the orphan home, it is so difficult to refuse sanctuary when Nepal is such a poor country with no government financial support. And so it is that a healthy 22 of us live in this 3 bedroom home ranging from a 15-month-old baby to a 27-year-old house dad.

To say that things are getting cramped is an understatement. I can't imagine what this young mother (who looks as if she could be 18 or 25 year old) has been through and the absolute thankfulness she harbors for food and a roof and smiling, embracing faces, but her dang baby cries all the time and she can really only help out with things when he is taking his nap. Did I mention that he eats more than any other child I've met...there is no shame in breast-feeding this big boy every 45 minutes or so.

That brings me to an interesting bit of irony we have come across in our time at Harka. The children who have the parents are by far the neediest and most annoying. There are several perspectives worth factoring in after such a comment. For one, to move into a home of 15 children just 1 1/2 years ago, can only make an already clinging 5-year-old Samjana and an undisciplined, lazy 7-year-old Ishwor, all the more desperate for their biological parents' attention and affection. The problem there is that neither Kumari, 23-year-old half-pint, cook, regular stomper of baisi dung-->compost whose loud voice immodulation screams into the face of an already crying Tulie to go to the bathroom and equally shouts 'Welcome' whenever we give her a 'Thank you', and her husband, Prim, a 27-year-old clean freak, whose middle-of-the-night random yellings have made Britta and I diagnose him with 'Sleeper Turrets' and who not only busts out in random Nepali song but also enjoys being the patriarch, neither give that much attention OR affection...to their own children, or any children, for that matter.

So these two children have an interesting environment where they are not made to do any chores like every other child (including 3-year-old Ashish who waddles back and forth from well to squatter making it shine), get extra treats like biscuits and fruit, sleep-in until food's ready, and get a bed the size Britta and I share to themselves (when our 4 preteen girls are sharing one). Needless to say, there is a lack of discipline, resulting in us calling Samjana bratface too frequently..she just smiles, laughs, and goes on to annoy someone else. It is hard to love this child. And then I remind myself of the fact that this girl who naturally is craving everyone's attention can't even get any from her own mother who in one day gained too many competing siblings, and the Lord grants me compassion. Ishwor, who is good in English for his age, curious about music (probably because his father listens and sings it too loud all the time), and tends to get along with the other children well, is just plain lazy...and I have a hard time handling laziness.

And so, with this latest addition of crying baby in the wee hours of the morning, it has caused us to seek a tad bit more refuge or places of silence (but those don't exactly exist with toddlers watching your every move to place a head on your side or make you watch them clasp their hands in the air...as if they're catching pockets of wind). In other words, Britta and I are looking forward to our little getaway. We leave Tuesday morning and return Thursday afternoon. We're hoping for a bit better connection to hopefully post more pictures and tell you of the adventures on the back of an elephant.

But I couldn't sign off before letting you know of a precious invitation the kiddos have given me and Britta. Not only have the children insisted that we come to their school program (to our knowledge, it's a field day/dance program/awards day that only parents are invited to) for the past week which takes place the majority of the day tomorrow, but they have also officially stopped calling us 'Miss', and started getting our attention with 'Didi' which stands for big sister. The first time I heard Sirjana say it to Britta and the following night have Soniya tell me, 'You no Miss, you Didi,' with her big grin lighted by an intimate fire, it was as if sunshine entered every pore of my body. What warmth, pure love, divine acceptance...what a glorious reward.

party of five

Baby goats and catfish were just getting us warmed up for what was to come. Britta turned 24 this past Saturday in a way she could have never imagined. She writes in far more detail on her own blog, but let's just say that clothed with full Nepali sari, hot pink lipstick, and bindi, she listened to 15 children try to sing "Happy Birthday", blew out candles to a cake that spelled her name 'Reecha' and we had to dance an uncomfortable amount of time in front of the children, our houseparents, Laxmi, and her two friends (who are now our two friends), Promise & Julie. Besides such an eventful celebration, we were invited to a family dinner 'party', witnessed a death (don't be too alarmed), were followed home by 35 school children whose backpacks boasted of Korea and the US Army (the children happened to be obsessed with WWF wrestling as well...a theme we are coming across here in Nepal), concocted a rather tasty fried banana pie, have become health care professionals by de-licing heads and treating bedsores, and have discovered that the rice patties are not only good for meditation and brief silence, but can also be transformed into a field day.

First things first...may our next door neighbors' parrot rest in peace. As Britta and I were making the pie Saturday afternoon we heard the children making more noise than usual. We look out the window only to see the annoying bird who jabbered off in Nepali all day constantly reciting his youngest master's name, Angila, come to his demise in the jaws of a mangy mutt who had already gotten one of our chickens earlier that week. I think Britta and I were more upset about it than any of the kids, including Angila.

Business has been a little different with our little ones as well. I should make it known that we finally have come to a consensus on the twins' names. Green shy sweet crybaby twin is officially Jamuna, and little blue devil is Gonga. That was definitely a minor victory. And now their heads are shaved and gentle Jamuna looks more like a baby Sinead O'Connor and Gonga who had a Dudley Moore haircut before now looks like Gonzo...she's hairy and wears blue all the time so that encourages the nickname. Let me back up..the first week we were here we were told that we needed to treat a few sores that Ashish and Tulie had on the back of their heads. While doing so we naturally looked at the twins to see if they had anything similar. Oh my goodness. Jamuna was covered with them and for who knows how long. Needless to say, we forced Laxmi to pay attention and for the past week and a half we have wiped boiling water to clean the wounds and then lathered her up with medicine. While doing so one day Britta and I made the pleasant discovery of lice. This is not surprising considering that every girl here has short short hair because every 6 months or so the lice becomes unbearable and heads are shaved. And so 2 days ago we cut the twins and Ashish's head to a bald roughness. Much puss and dozens of lice later, we had kids who were relatively scratch free. After taking Jamuna to the doctor yesterday with Laxmi for two tumor-like bumps on her head, we are now regularly dispensing medication for what is evidently just an infection. Who knew that an Art major looking into Environmental Studies and an English major looking into Peace Studies would be dressing so many wounds?? (we're still convinced that we were not made for health care)

Along with Sinead and Gonzo, Ashish is sporting his new due with ever-convincing charm. Britta already went into detail of our man who has several blue ribbons for his award-winning pot belly, cackles like an old man, waddles his no behind and pantless tiny legs back and forth from well to squatter to do his daily cleaning, said 'Intuhnet?' when we left them this morning, wears a tee shirt with 'The Rock' decorating his basketball of a stomach, never ever leaves a piece of rice to waste, and when he peeks his head into our door with flaring nostrils and those enormous curious eyes, he is the reincarnation of Jack Nicholson from 'The Shining.' Our four stay at homers have been covered, but today is Secil's day who completes this party of five.

Britta and I have no favorites here at the orphan home and make that clearly known to the few who constantly ask...but Secil is one of our favorites. The 4 year old loner who wears his pants low enough to constantly reveal an inch and a half of his bum crack, has a secret smile that makes you melt, will sneak underneath our legs in efforts to lift us on his shoulders (at which point I always exclaim, 'Hercules, Hercules!'), and when you least expect it will kiss you on your cheek with the sweetest puckered lips. I think it's safe to say that I have fallen for this kid. He has become my go to school partner where he'll swing from my hands, we'll run on the elevated rice patty divider like a thick tight rope, jump obstacles in which he'll occasionally fall and muddy up his enormous khaki pants, and for these kids where everyone's trash is their treasure, he'll pick up the cover of a calculator, a small alue (potato), piece of rope, rubber band, and place it in his back pocket for future delight. For those of you who know Johnathan Davis (mostly just the fam), he looks like a miniature Johnathan without the dreads.

Laxmi explained to us the other day that both of Secil's parents died of AIDS, but with a checkout every 3 months, Secil has miraculously remained negative. From the Gorka Region in Northwest Nepal has come this child who by all accounts should not be healthy, into an orphan home where he is already learning English, is surprisingly a great photographer, and eats rice to his little hearts content. All these things are why I am drawn to this young stud, but perhaps one reason that I realized not too long ago was that he is the closest age to what Hajari (the young infant I fell in love with at Mother's Choice in Hong Kong four years ago) would be today. Hajari will be 4 on April 27 and looked nothing like a full-blooded Chinese boy. For a long time we were convinced he had Indian in him or something to make his so magnificently adorable (don't worry, I think all Chinese babies are pretty darn flawless), but his papers showed that both parents were, in fact, Chinese. Likewise, Secil looks anywhere from Native American, Halfrican American (that's for Nate), or maybe Caucasion/Nepali, but no, his parents also surprisingly were both fulltime Nepali. I imagine what Hajari is doing every now and again when I'm playing with Secil (something I haven't done so consistently in many years), and it makes me sad to know that I will never know him as a young boy or a preteen, but these past 3 weeks with Secil have shown me that that love I had for Hajari will never die...it will be in my prayers for him as he slowly grows into this world, it will be in the love I have for this similar boy in a land not to far from his own, and one day it will radiate from the love I have for my own children.

I wish every single one of you could come spend the night with us here just so you could say goodnight to our five kiddos in their one bed...fist pounds and kisses don't get much better than this.

One week from today Britta and I will be taking a mini-vacation to Chitwan National Park (only 30 minutes away) for 3 days and 2 nights filled with a safari, elephant breeding center, bird watching, and showers. And we just found out the other day that there are only 2 of the older children who have yet to go on a safari...Secil and Budi. So in a couple more weeks we're going to make another day trip for that fun!

I hope all is well, and if you celebrate the Lenten season, I pray that the Lord will open your hearts for a time of repentance and an awareness of his love not only for you but for all his children.

Peace.